"Thought of the Day"

[mjp28]

Since I'm getting ready to watch favored DUKE play big underdog BUTLER for the NCAA title, a few basketball quotes, pro and con the game:

 

The invention of basketball was not an accident. It was developed to meet a need. Those boys simply would not play "Drop the Handkerchief." ~James Naismith

 

This is the second most exciting indoor sport, and the other one shouldn't have spectators. ~D. Vertleib

 

Any American boy can be a basketball star if he grows up, up, up. ~Bill Vaughn

 

If the NBA were on channel 5 and a bunch of frogs making love was on channel 4, I'd watch the frogs even if they were coming in fuzzy. ~Bobby Knight

 

I haven't been able to slam-dunk the basketball for the past five years. Or, for the thirty-eight years before that, either. ~Dave Barry

 

I liked the choreography, but I didn't care for the costumes. ~Tommy Tune, on why he never considered playing basketball

 

What is so fascinating about sitting around watching a bunch of pituitary cases stuff a ball through a hoop? ~Woody Allen, Annie Hall

 

The idea is not to block every shot. The idea is to make your opponent believe that you might block every shot. ~Bill Russell (ONE OF MY FAVORITE ALL TIME PLAYERS)

[Icedrake]

I dream of a better tomorrow... where chickens can cross roads and not have their motives questioned

 

**********************

 

Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poke me in the ribs and cackle, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.

 

*********************

 

I wanted to become an atheist but I gave it up. They have no holidays.

- Henny Youngman

These three are amazing!

[Corona]

from Dark Roasted Blend, around 2006...

 

Every year, English teachers from across the USA can

submit their collections of actual analogies and

metaphors found in high school essays.

These excerpts are published each year to the

amusement of teachers across the country. Here are

last year's winners.

 

1. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had

its two sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.

 

2. His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and

breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without

Cling Free.

 

3. He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from

experience, like a guy who went blind because he

looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes

with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country

speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking

at a solar eclipse without one of those

boxes with a pinhole in it.

 

4. She grew on him like she was a colony of E. Coli,

and he was room-temperature Canadian beef.

 

5. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that

sound a dog makes just before it throws up.

 

6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

 

7. He was as tall as a six-foot, three-inch tree.

 

8. The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had

disintegrated because of his wife's infidelity came as

a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly

surcharge-free ATM machine.

 

9. The little boat gently drifted across the pond

exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.

 

10. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like

a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.

 

11. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole

scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you're

on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at

7:00 p.m. Instead of 7:30.

 

12. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair

after a sneeze.

 

13. The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like

maggots when you fry them in hot grease.

 

14. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed

lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other

like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at

6:36 p.m. Traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka

at 4:19 p.m. At a speed of 35 mph.

 

15. They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with

picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan's teeth.

 

16. John and Mary had never met. They were like two

hummingbirds who had also never met.

 

17. He fell for her like his heart was a mob

informant, and she was the East River.

 

18. Even in his last years, Granddad had a mind like a

steel trap, only one that had been left out so long,

it had rusted shut.

 

19. Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.

 

20. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil.

But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.

 

21. The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you

get from not eating for a while.

 

22. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical

lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually

lame, maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.

 

23. The ballerina rose gracefully en Pointe and

extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a

fire hydrant.

 

24. It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing

kids around with power tools.

 

25. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought

he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing

up.

[hazelnut]

Some good ones there Corona!!!

[Corona]

I especially like the boat/bowling ball one.

[1984]

"People that go to bed with itchy bum wake up with smelly fingers."

[login123]

If the Universe is expanding, should we invest in real estate?

[mjp28]

~A few thoughts about....money~ (hey, I'm an MBA type guy)

 

Robert Frost

A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain.

 

Samuel Butler

Friendship is like money, easier made than kept.

 

Norman Vincent Peale

Empty pockets never held anyone back. Only empty heads and empty hearts can do that.

 

Chester L. Karrass

In business, you don't get what you deserve, you get what you negotiate.

[Fluffy]

Military Thoughts of the Day !

 

WISDOM FROM TRAINING MANUALS

 

 

 

 

'If the enemy is in range, so are you.'

- Infantry Journal-

 

 

'It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed.'

- US.Air Force Manual -

 

 

'Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword, obviously never encountered automatic weapons.'

- General MacArthur -

 

 

'You, you, and you ... Panic. The rest of you, come with me.'

- Infantry Sgt.-

 

 

'Tracers work both ways.'

- Army Ordnance Manual-

 

 

'Five second fuses last about three seconds.'

- Infantry Journal -

 

 

The three most useless things in aviation are: Fuel in the bowser; Runway behind you; and Air above you.

-Basic Flight Training Manual-

 

'Any ship can be a minesweeper. Once.'

- Naval Ops Manual -

 

'Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do.'

- Unknown Infantry Recruit-

 

 

'If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up to him.'

- Infantry Journal-

 

 

'Yea, Though I Fly Through the Valley of the Shadow of Death, I Shall Fear No Evil. For I am at 50,000 Feet and Climbing.'

- Sign over SR71 Wing Ops-

 

'You've never been lost until you've been lost at Mach 3.'

-Paul F. Crickmore (SR71 test pilot)-

 

 

'The only time you have too much fuel is when you're on fire.'

-Unknown Author-

 

 

 

 

'If the wings are traveling faster than the fuselage it has to be a helicopter -- and therefore, unsafe.'

- Fixed Wing Pilot-

 

 

 

 

'When one engine fails on a twin-engine airplane, you always have enough power left to get you to the scene of the crash.'

-Multi-Engine Training Manual-

 

'Without ammunition, the Air Force is just an expensive flying club.'

-Unknown Author-

 

 

 

 

'If you hear me yell;"Eject, Eject, Eject!", the last two will be echos.'

If you stop to ask "Why?", you'll be talking to yourself, because by then you'll be the pilot.'

-Pre-flight Briefing from a Canadian F104 Pilot-

 

 

 

'What is the similarity between air traffic controllers and pilots?

If a pilot screws up, the pilot dies; but If ATC screws up, .... the pilot dies.'

-Sign over Control Tower Door-

 

 

 

'Never trade luck for skill.'

-Author Unknown-

 

 

 

The three most common expressions (or famous last words) in military aviation are:'Did you feel that?' 'What's that noise?' and'Oh S...!'

-Authors Unknown-

 

 

 

 

'Airspeed, altitude and brains. Two are always needed to successfully complete the flight.'

-Basic Flight Training Manual-

 

 

 

 

'Flying the airplane is more important than radioing your plight to a person on the ground incapable of understanding or doing anything about it.'

- Emergency Checklist-

 

 

 

 

'The Piper Cub is the safest airplane in the world; it can just barely kill you.'

- Attributed to Max Stanley (Northrop test pilot) -

 

 

'There is no reason to fly through a thunderstorm in peacetime.'

-Sign over Squadron Ops Desk at Davis-Montham AFB, AZ-

 

 

'You know that your landing gear is up and locked when it takes full power to taxi to the terminal.' - Lead-in Fighter Training Manual -

 

 

 

As the test pilot climbs out of the experimental aircraft,

 

having torn off the wings and tail in the crash landing, the crash truck arrives.

 

 

The rescuer sees the bloodied pilot and asks,'What happened?'

The pilot's reply: 'I don't know, I just got here myself!'

[hazelnut]

Good ones Fluffy

[JDPower]

Yup, really like them Fluffy

[mjp28]

'Any ship can be a minesweeper. Once.'

- Naval Ops Manual -

 

That's a good thought.

 

My dad started out on a minesweeper at the beginning of WWII, a real "interesting" job during the invasions in N. Africa and Italy.

 

Before the troops in the landing craft, the bigger ships, the brass come wading ashore with all the newsreels running someone had to go out and cut and destroy all those mines....in a small wooden ship (so you wouldn't detonate the magnetic mines) with a lot of horsepower and a bunch of .50 cal machine guns to blow up the mines when they came up to the surface.

 

They had long cables with steel fins to flare out and cut the mine cables, when they popped up you got on the .50 cals and fired away.

 

All this while you were dodging German fighters trying to strafe your ship.

 

Some way to become decorated for bravery! But he did move up the ranks becoming a CPO on the battleship New Jersey in the WestPac.....which led him to be called back up to the Korean War.

[Fluffy]

'Any ship can be a minesweeper. Once.'

- Naval Ops Manual -

 

That's a good thought.

 

My dad started out on a minesweeper at the beginning of WWII, a real "interesting" job during the invasions in N. Africa and Italy.

 

Before the troops in the landing craft, the bigger ships, the brass come wading ashore with all the newsreels running someone had to go out and cut and destroy all those mines....in a small wooden ship (so you wouldn't detonate the magnetic mines) with a lot of horsepower and a bunch of .50 cal machine guns to blow up the mines when they came up to the surface.

 

They had long cables with steel fins to flare out and cut the mine cables, when they popped up you got on the .50 cals and fired away.

 

All this while you were dodging German fighters trying to strafe your ship.

 

Some way to become decorated for bravery! But he did move up the ranks becoming a CPO on the battleship New Jersey in the WestPac.....which led him to be called back up to the Korean War.

 

 

Big Respect to your Dad,mjp28

[mjp28]

Big Respect to your Dad,mjp28

Thanks, he was quite a guy, a really nice hard working, kind caring person, like a lot of WWII vets they just did their jobs and came home rarely talking about it.

 

My father-in-law was also a very similar guy who also was highly decorated master seargent who went through a bunch of real hell holes in the Pacific....very similar to HBO's "The Pacific" which is running now and very realistic.

 

A great "Thought of the Day", thank Goodness for men like them.

[Ishi]

HBO's "The Pacific" which is running now and very realistic.

 

Hey, I just watched the 7th episode of The Pacific, I have watched it since part 1 and the opening theme music just makes me feel sad though. It was aired since last Saturday, then again yesterday but I recorded it using Windows Media Center cause I had to do something else when it was being shown. I think it had a little more action than the Band of Brothers. I like war films too.

 

The thought that was inspiring for me today was:

 

"Many roads can take you there, many different ways

One direction takes you years, another takes you days"

 

Its from an unreleased Beatles song "Dehra Dhun". I don't use drugs but hearing this makes me feel spiritual that way.

[mjp28]

Well a change of pace......

 

It's only rock 'n' roll, but I like it

-- by the Rolling Stones

 

If everyone demanded peace instead of another television set, then there'd be peace.

-- John Lennon

 

Mick Jagger is the perfect rock star. There's nobody more perfect than Jagger. He's rude, he's ugly-attractive, he's brilliant. The Rolling Stones are the perfect rock group -- they don't give a ****.

-- Elton John

 

Rock is so much fun. That's what it's all about -- filling up the chest cavities and empty kneecaps and elbows.

-- Jim Hendrix

 

Ours is the folk music of the technological age.

-- Jimmy Page

[mjp28]

Time for a few thoughts to liven things up a bit......

 

What is a cynic? A man who knows the price of everything and the value of nothing.

- Oscar Wilde

 

There is no such thing as a moral or an immoral book. Books are well written or badly written.

- Oscar Wilde

 

?You are not responsible

for what people think about you.

But you are responsible for

what you give them to think about you.?

 

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

 

?All our dreams can come true,

if we have the courage to pursue them.?

 

~ Walt Disney

[JDPower]

If you're reading this, you're alive. And if that's not something to smile about, I don't know what is

[mjp28]

A few thoughts about a fool and his money....or just having some fun, depending on your viewpoint (or luck).

 

A weekend in Vegas without gambling and drinking is just like being a born-again Christian.

 

I like to play blackjack. I'm not addicted to gambling. I'm addicted to sitting in a semi-circle.

 

Italians come to ruin most generally in three ways, women, gambling, and farming. My family chose the slowest one. - Pope John XXIII

 

Part of it went on gambling, and part of it went on women. The rest I spent foolishly. - George Raft

 

There is no gambling like politics. - Benjamin Disraeli

[mjp28]

-If a man is in a forest talking to himself with no women around, is he still wrong?

 

-To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

 

-Thirty-five is when you finally get your head together and your body starts falling apart.

 

-Sometimes I wonder whether the world is being run by smart people who are putting us on or by imbeciles who really mean it. - Mark Twain

[mjp28]

"A wise man gets more use from his enemies than a fool from his friends." - Baltasar Gracian

 

"If you put the federal government in charge of the Sahara Desert, in five years there'd be a shortage of sand." - Milton Friedman

 

"A hundred times every day I remind myself that my inner and outer life depend on the labors of other men, living and dead, and that I must exert myself in order to give in the same measure as I have received and am still receiving." - Albert Einstein

 

"An inventor is simply a fellow who doesn't take his education too seriously." - Charles F. Kettering

 

"When I was young I thought that money was the most important thing in life; now that I am old I know that it is." - Oscar Wilde

[Winapp2.ini]

“A society grows great when old men plant trees whose shade they know they shall never sit in.” –Greek proverb

[Fluffy]

"When your going through hell..........keep going."

 

Winston Churchill

[craigathus]

"Don't put anything in your ear that's bigger than your elbow."

[Corona]

"You can't bend rock."